A Date of Godlike Proportions by @tellulahdarling #YA #Comedy #Mythology

A Date of Godlike Proportions
(The Blooming Goddess Trilogy, #2.5)
by:  Tellulah Darling



Publication:   Dec. 20, 2013
ASIN:  B00HCQ2YQI
Length:  28 pages
Genres:   Comedy, Mythology, Young Adult






Blurb:


There's bound to be pressure when it takes 2500 years to get a second date.  Which is exactly why Theo Rockman, a.k.a. Prometheus, would rather n ot go.  With his best friend gravely injured and the fate of humanity still on the line, Theo has all sorts of creative excuses to avoid dating swoon-worthy god and love of his life, Hephaestus.

YA romantic comedy gets an epic mythological twist in the free (at select retailers) short story A Date of Godlike Proportions (The Blooming Goddess Trilogy, Book 2.5).  Being human hasn't killed Theo, but this date just might.

Buy it :  Amazon  |  iTunes  |  Free at Kobo

Tellulah Darling's Top 5 Romantic Comedy Films

1) When Harry Met Sally - This movie is the gold standard of romcoms. It's funny, it's insightful, the characters are flawed and deluded and above all its totally fabulous and all about love. Also, I'm a sucker for "best friends becoming more" films. In fact my first novel, Sam Cruz's Infallible Guide to Getting Girls was written precisely because I love this film so much.

2) The Princess Bride - I've met people who don't like this film with its whimsey and wit and magic and love. They are cold dead people. No judgement. I'm just saying. It also wins for best way to say "I love you."

3) Scott Pilgrim Vs the World - There have been a lot of crappy romcoms in the past decade or so but this isn't one of them. The premise of having to battle Ramona's seven evil exes is so fun and executed with such glee. The love triangle (square?) is wonderful and I love Kieran Culkan. There is no downside to this film. So over the top and yet wonderfully deadpan at the same time.

4) His Girl Friday - If, like me, you like your banter witty and your leads so very deluded in their feelings for each other, then this is your film. The dialogue is gunfire fast and whip smart. I love, loathe, and love again Cary Grant's character, while Rosalind Russell gives as good as she gets. A classic for all the best reasons.

5) Strictly Ballroom - Any film whose HEA is captured in a joyous dance number is okay by me. Plus it's an ugly duckling story and the scene with Doris Day singing "Perhaps Perhaps Perhaps" makes me swoon like nothing else. Another totally over-the-top film but if you can't go big when it comes to love, then go home.

I hope I gave you some new romcom favs today. Let me know which ones you love!

* My absolutely favorite movie is The Princess Bride..  Love it to pieces..  "As you wish"*
- Momma Chaos  

Tellulah Darling
noun
1. YA Novelist
2. Alter ego of former screenwriter and instructor
3. Sassy minx

Geeks out over: cool tech,
Squees for: great storytelling.
Delights in: fabulous conversation.
Writes about: where love meets comedy. Awkwardness ensues.

Stalk her :

Website  |  Goodreads  |  Twitter  |  Facebook

Continue reading →

Overfalls : The Merworld Water Wars series by @SuttonShields #YA #Fantasy

Overfalls
(The Merworld Water Wars #2)
by :  Sutton Shields


Publication:  July 2013
ISBN:  1492718408
ASIN:   B00E0MKEFU
Length: 432 pages
Genre: YA, Urban Fantasy, Mythology


Synopsis: 

Two secret wishes.  Only one will be granted.  Let the Mer-Nor Games begin.

Unlike most high school seniors, Marina Valentine isn't sweating college (she's outlawed from even applying), the prom (she has her dream date... possibly), or graduation (though surviving to rock the ill-fitting gown is iffy).  No, she's a little preoccupied with succeeding as a walking myth post-graduation.  So, when Marina awakens as the one and only Siren Savior, she thinks the tide is about to turn on the merbitch's mer-psycho family.  Unfortunately, she has issues with her flighty Savior powers, and the timing couldn't be worse.  For with the arrival of a feared foe, comes the promise of a disastrous year... and that's an understatement.

For years, mythological beings have awaited the fulfillment of a mysterious prophecy involving Merpeople, Normals, an epic clash, and a wish that could forever change one group's destiny.  But the real trouble begins when an assassin known as The Dealer starts sending her cryptic messages written on potentially lethal playing cards.

The Dealer makes one thing very clear:  someone Marina loves will die.  Now, she must find The Dealer before he (or she) finds his victim.  But with everyone either a suspect or a target, how will Marina be able to uncover the truth before time runs out?

Not even the Siren Savior in all her power can prepare for the devastating answers.

  Buy it : Kindle   |    Paperback 

Finned
(The Merworld Water Wars #1)
by: Sutton Shields


Publication:  Nov. 2012
ISBN:  1481101382
ASIN:  B00A92CMRI
Length:  310 pages
Genres: YA, mythology, Urban Fantasy


Synopsis: 

Take a fish-phobic girl, divide her by one hot merman, add a splash of his crazy ex-merbitch, and you get one stinky school year.

Sixteen-year-old Marina Valentine is a rule-stretcher in an uptight Texas seaside town.  She's hormonally challenged, curious to a fault, hates fish, and has a dating resume that makes the queen look like a slut.  It's not that guys don't ask her out.  They do.  She just has an unfortunate reaction to dating -- unctrollable gags.  It's not exactly a turn on.

One by one, her oddball friends start disappearing- much to the joy of the snobby high school royals- and Marina fears she is a walking bull's eye.  Inquires into their disappearances lead to startling, gag-worthy discoveries.  Toss in an increasingly inconvenient attraction to one of the royals - who holds the key to solving the mystery ... in his fin- and it's an anti-fish girl's worst nightmare come true.   Soon, Marina finds herself at the center of a looming underwater war that's really going to play games with her love life.

As time closes in -  and the Merpeople offically come out of the ocean- Marina must choose between the lives of her friends, the future of an underwater utopia, and the life of her first love.  There's just one problem.  Where does a love-shy, fish-phobic, non-mergirl evenb egin... especially when her enemy may be the one person she trusted above everyone else?

  Buy it :  Kindle   |    Paperback 

I'm a dreamer, believer in the unbelievable, and author of the upcoming series The Merwold Water Wars, FINNED (Wave One).

I'm a handbag-loving gal who LOVES to watch sports- football, baseball, basketball, NASCAR, you name it.  I take being a fan very seriously.

One thing I love most is trying to make people smile, even if it means making a fool out of myself (trust me, my inner idiot is bound to make multiple appearances).

I have a completely irrational fear of grasshoppers, worry that piranha may secretly lurk in lakes, and try to find the bright side in everything, even if I annoy myself doing so.

Stalk Her : 

Twitter | Blog | Goodreads

Continue reading →

[ #Excerpt + #Giveaway ] My Date From Hell by @tellulahdarling #YA

My Date From Hell
(The Blooming Goddess Trilogy #2 )
by : Tellulah Darling



Publication:  October 31, 2013
ISBN:  098805406X
ASIN:  B00G8OYCEM
Length:  388 pages
Genres:  Comedy, Mythology, Young Adult


Book Description: 

Sophie Bloom's junior year has been a bit of a train wreck.  After the world's greatest kiss re-awakened Sophie's true identity as Persephone (Goddess of Spring and Savior of Humanity), she fought her dragon-lady guidance counselor to the death, navigated mean girl Bethany's bitchy troublemaking, and dealt with the betrayal of her backstabbing ex, Kai (sexy Prince of Darkness).  You'd think a girl could catch a break.

Yeah, right.

With Zeus stepping things up, it's vital that Sophie retrieve Persephone's memories and discover the location of the ritual to stop Zeus and Hades.  So when Aphrodite strikes a deal that can unlock Sophie's pre-mortal past, what choice does the teen goddess have but to accept?

The mission:  stop media mogul Hermes from turning Bethany into a global mega-celebrity.  The catch?  Aphrodite partners Sophie and Kai to work together... and treat this suicide mission as a date.  Which could work out for Sophie's plan to force Kai to admit his feelings for her -- if she doesn't kill him first.

Add to the fact that BFF Theo's love life and other BFF Hannah's actual life are in Sophie's hands, and suddenly being a teenager -- even a godlike one -- seems a bit like...  well, hell.  Whatever happened to dinner and a movie?

The YA romantic comedy / Greek mythology fireworks continue to fly in My Date From Hell.  Love meets comedy with a whole lot of sass in book two of this teen fantasy romance series.  Breaking up is easy; dating is deadly.

  Buy it :  Kindle  |   Paperback 

Aphrodite pointed her gun at me again, kind of casually. “Your problem is you’re too hung up on the past. You gotta move forward with yer life.” 

I heard Hannah give a smothered laugh. 

“You got this cutie pie in love with ya, and instead of enjoying his company, all you do is whine.” With a quick flick, Aphrodite opened the cylinder to reload. 

“He’s not in love,” I said. 

She peered at Kai. “Whattya talkin’ about? Sure he is. Everyone knows Kyrillos loves Persephone.” 

“I’m Sophie,” I ground out.
She waved the gun around. “Ya ya. That too.”
That too? I took a deep breath, folded my fingers over my palms and looked slightly to the left of her in case I accidentally started blasting. Didn’t want to go down in history as the girl who killed the Goddess of Love. 

“Nope. It’s just desire,” I said with faked calm. “Kai is so resistant to the idea of being in love with me that your arrows don’t work. Besides which, when he actually does fall so hard for me that he doesn’t know which way is up, I want him to know he chose that of his own free will. That he chose me.” I threw him a sweet smile. 

“Chose you?” Kai got this look of “have we had this conversation before?” on his face. My smile got tight. 

Aphrodite scooped up a saclike pink purse laying on the ground. She rooted around in it. “Desire is part of romantic love, silly,” she said to me.
She pulled out a handful of bullets and dumped them in Festos’ hurriedly outstretched hands before turning back to Kai. She gestured with the still-open chambered revolver toward him. “Your body knows what’s what. Stop fighting it.”
Kai glowered at her.
She laughed it off, reloading. “And you,” Aphrodite said to me, as she plucked more bullets from Festos’ hand to load into the chamber. “Yer just as bad with your own issues.” 

She couldn’t know about my insecurities around Persephone could she? Aphrodite narrowed her eyes at me.
I gulped.
Aphrodite shot me a look of disgust and popped the final bullets into the chambers. She gestured at each of us in turn with one pink, sparkly manicured finger. “I’m gonna start gettin’ real mad about how youse is all dealin’ with love.” 

“There’s a whole bunch of drags around here where love is concerned,” Festos agreed. 

“Thanks so much for inviting him along,” Theo said to me. 

I grimaced an apology at Theo, then shot back at Festos, “Seems there’s a whole bunch of dogs here, too.” I looked between him and Kai. 

“Oh don’t forget Pierce,” Festos replied cheerfully. “He’s a total mimbo.” “He is not,” Hannah defended. “He’s pure love.”
Aphrodite threw her a fond smile. “I like you, girlie.”


“Love in name, hormones in game,” Theo countered. 

“Look at us all in agreement,” Festos replied.
“No, because you’re talking about lust,” I protested.
“Lust is pretty good too,” Aphrodite said, “but it ain’t nothin’ like the real thing.” She clicked the cylinder into place and looked at me. “We got a deal? You’ll get Jack to kill the campaign?” 

“You’ll undo the love thing?” I asked. 

“Nope. You could do with a little love in your life. Kyrillos is obviously brimming with love for ya now,” she ignored Kai’s snort, “so you’re gonna enjoy it.” 

“Meaning what?” I asked. 

“A date,” Kai piped up. “I’d say I’m ready now.” He arched an eyebrow as if to say “ball’s in your court.” 

“I think it’s a great idea,” I slid my arm around his waist and pressed myself up against his side.
A look of surprise flashed across his face. “Perfect.”
I could outdate him any place, any time. I brightened. This was going to be fun. The touching part wasn’t a downside either.
“The fate of the world does dee-pend on you loving each other,” Aphrodite said. “So, good. We’ll start with a date.”
“Still say it’s a euphemism,” Festos burst out. “And Kai doesn’t date.”
Kai snaked his arm around my waist before pressing his fingertips into my hip. “Never wanted to before. Sophie’s the exception.”
“The euphemistic exception?” Festos asked.
“Shut up,” Kai and I fired at him in tandem.
Festos took it in stride, waggling his eyebrows cheerfully at Theo who pretended to look disapproving but totally wasn’t. Even Hannah didn’t bother to hide her smile. 

“Only thing is,” I told Aphrodite, “I have to be back at school by Sunday morning. I have a meeting I can’t miss. So I’ll have to get this thing with Jack done quickly to have time for the date.” 

“Going together to find Hermes is the date.” Aphrodite looked at me like I was an idiot. “You two need as much together time as possible.” 

No way. I needed all my wits about me to handle Kai. Something that couldn’t happen if I had to track down Hermes at the same time. I tried a new tactic. “A date involves dinner and a movie. Something romantic. Finding Hermes hardly counts.” 

She pinned me in her gaze. “Had so miny of them, Miz Expert? All a date is, is two people spendin’ time to deepen their attraction.” 

“Or kill it,” Hannah piped up.


Aphrodite scrunched up her nose. “Huh?”


“There are far more first dates than second,” Hannah explained. “Which means that after spending time, those people realized they were not a match.” 

“What she said,” I seconded.


Aphrodite narrowed her eyes at Hannah. “I don’t get ya. You talk like that but you’re so brim up with love.”


“I’m a confounding enigma,” Hannah replied cheerfully.


Aphrodite threw her hands up. “Enough’a this nonsense. You’ll go together to find Hermes. And you’ll be date-like doin’ it.”
That sounded like a threat.
“Almost like you planned it that way,” I said to Kai. 

His smile grew wider as he gave my waist a squeeze. “Told you I get what I want. Feel free to let that sink in.”

Tellulah Darling
noun
1. YA Novelist
2. Alter ego of former screenwriter and instructor
3. Sassy minx

Geeks out over : cool tech.
Squees for : great storytelling.
Delights in:  fabulous conversation.
Writes about: where love meets comedy.  Awkwardness ensues.

Stalk her : 

Website   |   Goodreads   |   Twitter   |   Facebook 

a Rafflecopter giveaway

Continue reading →